Proverbs 18:1
One who has isolated himself seeks his own desires;
he rejects all sound judgment.
I don’t know if you know this about me, but I’m kind of an introvert. In some settings I have learned to be a people person, but a lot of it has been learned behavior. There have been a few times though, that being in groups of people felt natural to me. And they were all in church.
I remember in our church growing up, feeling that all these people were more like family than they were a crowd of people. That has also happened so some extent in other churches we have worked in over the years.
All that to say, I understand those who have a hard time opening up to a group of people, or even being around large groups of people. I get it. I’m right there with ya.
But, while I understand the anxiety that comes with that, I also know that there is much to be gained from being in community. There is much to be gained by not being all by yourself in this world. It is not just relationships and community, but also wisdom.
In fact, we see that the one who doesn’t join in community rejects all sound judgement. It is in not normal to be by yourself. It is not normal to struggle in isolation. It’s not the way we were designed or created. From the very beginning of human history, we were not alone. In fact, God made Eve because He saw that it was not good for Adam to be alone.
Even more than relationships, we find sound judgement in community. You’ve probably experienced this in your life, but may not have given the credit to community and relationships. For instance…
Have you ever had a problem you’ve been facing in life, but just couldn’t come up with a good solution? Sure you have. Everyone has. But then, you mention it to one person and they are able to see it from a totally different perspective to you, and they give you an idea that you wouldn’t have ever come up with on your own. Sound judgement doesn’t come in isolation. Sound judgement comes in relationships.
If you have been struggling with a situation, find some community and you’ll likely find the answer you’ve been looking for.
Let me just encourage you who are introverts. It doesn’t seem to be worth the risk to let people into your life, but let me assure you that it is. Even if it’s only for a season, these relationships add stuff to your life that wouldn’t have been there otherwise. And though they may move on, and you aren’t as connected as you once were, they added something that you didn’t have before.
So, go ahead. Give it another try. If you “still haven’t found what you’re looking for” it may be because you’re trying to find it in yourself, and that’s just not going to happen. 1 is too small a number to achieve greatness.